A stunning claim!

No, not some new outrage from the Romney campaign. Here’s the headline:

Windows 8 Tablets: the most successful tablets ever. >[my emphasis]

This gem of unbelievable hype comes to us from this article at ZDNet, well-known hater of Apple and shameless shill for Microsoft in this article. Please note the implied past tense – the implication that this has already happened, remarkable for a product that is not even available to the ZDNet reviewer, much less the public. This is more astounding than if I heard Fox claim Mittens is already the best president, ever. And this staggering quote:

I feel as if they’ll take the market by storm for one single reason alone: Windows 8. Tablets have been around for years. Windows has been around for years. Windows tablets have been around for years.

Windows tablets have been around for years! Where, in Balmer’s imagination? Has anyone ever seen even just one? Hey, ZDNet, remember Zune, the MP3 player kids who were unlucky enough to have their parents get them one arranged to be quickly stolen or lost or broken!

Of course the premise is that enterprise hates Apple and now with Microsoft in the game, IT will order employees to get this piece of junk whether they want it or not. Hey, remember how everyone said IT would never allow iPhones on their servers? Do you also note that RIM, the Microsoft of phones, is on the verge of bankruptcy and completely disappearing? This idea that corporate IT can dictate who uses what is woefully obsolete and in the case of Apple vs Windows products also absurdly wrong.

In addition to the pesky facts, that Microsoft is not even an also-ran in mobile despite multiple tries (missteps, actually) the claim that they’ll just show up and blow iPads away the way PCs killed Macs is so 1990s.

The fact is that Apple has created an icon. And those people who actually run enterprises want that icon, not a clunky BlackBerry or Windows phone, and not a clunky unproven (and unavailable) Microsoft tablet. Sorry, IT just doesn’t have that power; Apple mobile devices have already flooded in. I personally know of a case where the CEO of a large enterprise got an iPhone and told IT to connect it to his company’s email. When told by IT iPhones weren’t allowed to connect to company servers, the CEO literally said, well, they are now. iPhones blew into enterprise so fast IT couldn’t possibly foot-drag enough to even slow them down.

My former company, EMC, is typical via two new marketing slogans for its Information Intelligence Group’s products: 1) “choice computing”, and, 2) “the new user”. What this means is simple – iPads. And getting apps on the iPad (and later iPhone) to connect to mission-critical sensitive and highly regimented software was one of the highest priority initiatives (now accomplished). “new user” is simple – people are filtering into the workplace that have grown up with iPhones (or at minimum smartphones better than BlackBerry’s) and they expect to do their job using their mobile devices, not just Windows laptops any more (and existing old farts are adopting mobile stuff as fast as the kids are). And “choice computing” just reinforces that, the world is not just Windows laptops anymore; it is a wide range of mobile choices that are a completely new ballgame.   IT will get it or get moved out of the way. (ZDNet has probably never heard of the ‘cloud’ and still thinks all enterprise applications are buried under bombproof layers of IT-dictated restricted environments).

So not only is this purely wishful thinking it is old-fashioned thinking and I wish I could ask,  Ken Hess, the author of this piece of nonsense about his predictions in about two years. If you’re listening Ken, I’m also interested in a nice little wager right now, so put your money where your mouth is.


About dmill96

old fat (but now getting trim and fit) guy, who used to create software in Silicon Valley (almost before it was called that), who used to go backpacking and bicycling and cross-country skiing and now geodashes, drives AWD in Wyoming, takes pictures, and writes long blog posts and does xizquvjyk.
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One Response to A stunning claim!

  1. dmill96 says:

    ZDNet is really in peak shill mode for Surface, they almost exceed FauxNews for breathless partisanship. Another silly article, “My love of Windows Phone drove me to order a 64GB Microsoft Surface”. Someone can “love” Windows Phone – oh yeah.

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